any fitness buffs?

ok, i need some help. i've been looking around the net for a 3-day exercise routine to repeat 2x a week or a 5-day routine once a week. i find lots of varying routines. are there any fitness buffs who read this blog, or anyone who reads this blog who knows a fitness buff? running is out of the questions til i lose a few stones, but i use the elliptical and bike. also, jules will tell ya, i need a butt. any good butt building exercises? thanks for any help. later.