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13 July 2005

the ghost of JITH-mas past

i was looking at my vacation schedule, and saw that i had requested off starting today for jambo. sucks. this'll be the first time in ages i've not gone. not very happy about that. oh the memories (this is long)...

--lots of beer
--squirt bottles
--sleeping (passing out) on the hard ground in a tent on a slope
--waking up in said tent with lots of morning dew
--drunk dry grass sliding at the campgrounds
--drunk wet tarp sliding in JITH (i hold the record, 5 tarps + about 50 more feet of rough sharp grass)
--watching lynyrd skynyrd in the pourin' down rain with a canadian hiding under our tarp
--flanagan's party at the campgrounds with live music and dancing
--jick being pissed off and red screaming at the top of his lungs "i'm gonna BEAT MY MEAT" to get jick's mind off things, then once we were all in the car, taking off again
--that permanent marker tattoos that didn't tan through
        99% canadian eh?
        happy nipple day!
        i like boobs
        i like little boys (you all suck for watching him write that on me)
        a botched maple leaf
        rub the buddha
--massive dehydration
--low nutritional value food to save money for beer
--jick trying to burn steadman's tatas during alan jackson
--steadman calling jick an asshole
--jick calling steadman a C--T
--steadman storming off and me the whipped boyfriend following, she broke her sandals so i gave her my boots and i walked barefoot forever and it hurt a lot
--me being too drunk to remember my phone number (and pissed at missing alan jackson)
--making steadman's mom cry
--drunk dials
--sprints through massive crowds tackling tailgates and lawnchairs alike
--losing "blue" when red threw her at a tent (that's right i think)
--lots of flashing
--seeing lots of boobs of people i probably shouldn't (sorry T and others)
--hooters application
--liver bad, must be punished
--hookups, breakups, fights (too many fights)
--alice flying across "crouching tiger, hidden dragon" style to start a fight
--hiding steadman from buck, the super juicer
--being DRAGGED to JITH on sunday, getting stuffed against my will with McD's hash browns and pepto pills, then picking up right where i left off the night before drinking myself into oblivion
--action shot of the projectile vomiting (i told steadman i didn't want a pulled pork sandwich)
--spencer being concerned about my health just cuz he was in the med tent the year before (lightweight)
--water alley
--green E
--running of the rednecks (dangerous, way too early, way to drunk/hungover, but fun)
--random walmart runs to replace the 20 spray bottles we'd lose daily
--CONSTANTLY draining the cooler to spray people with ice water
--the birth of the world's most unhealthiest man contest (damn that hill and the need for 8-10 stops and half a pack of cigarettes to climb it (T at least))
--finding out JFK Jr was missing at crozier's camp and getting the giggles eating beef
--the crazy guy who dances in the red flyer wagon
--mud diving down the hill, breaking ribs doing it, hosing off, finding out in the morning that my drunken brain only thought to hose off the parts it could see, thus lots of mud in the tent from the back of me
--drunken german suplexes with steadman's brother on the hard HARD ground
--drinking our week's worth of beer pre-partying at the campsites before JITH even started
--we HAVE bracelets (going into fine day)...just keep walking man
--lots of sunburn
--steadman ALWAYS on the cooler
--jello shots and sharing the spiked watermelon with the people behind us
--pulled pork sandwiches
--walking around with ear plugs in my nose and trying to talk to friends without laughing
--the annual "bringing out of the belly" when i'm finally drunk enough not to care
--people having sex beside me in the tent **GRUMBLE**

if i think of more, i'll add 'em. i'll be dreaming i was there. too bad none of you guys are going. hey, if i missed some (likely due to blacking out), comment me some fond or not so fond memories.

oh, yeah, and due to my intake of excessive alcohol on sunday, i missed the live chicagoland NASCAR race, though i'm sure my subconscious picked up some as i passed out with the TV on the right channel. better luck next week.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

what abt klempa taking pics with the old lady with big boobs and the "birdman" ?


11:34 AM, July 13, 2005  
Anonymous this ain't no motherfuckin' t said...

Hey Z what about the time me and you went on a trip to find some titties, and our line was "my friend is from ____ , he hasn't seen any titties this year. Will you show him your's?" The only taker was some 40-50 year old with saggy fun bags.

9:23 PM, July 13, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yeah but when u made Steadmans mom cry, i clearly remember in our drunken stupor, Steadmans mom made the Zman cry too,, lol hugs zac, was all good *S*
"Steadmans Mom"

12:15 AM, July 14, 2005  
Blogger Christopher Trottier said...

Damn, sounds like a great time.

2:38 AM, July 14, 2005  

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