behind the cheap velvet-knockoff rope

as was expected, we worked late new year's eve. we got outta here around 10:40PM, back to the hotel at 11:00PM. dropped our bags in the room, changed clothes quick, and down to the bar. tonight, there was a 300 rupee cover charge to get in. emma and i are walking in the door and get stopped and ushered aside into the manager's office. two guys i've never seen, who apparently work for the hotel, tell us they'd prefer we not go into the bar tonight. "it's a bit of a rowdy crowd, in there," they said. WHOA NELLY!!!. i damn near BOUGHT that bar since i've been here. it's new year's eve and i only have 1 hour left to get as blootered as possible to recover some semblance of goodness about new year's eve in india. so bacdafucup! but that was all in my head. in my usual passive-aggressive style, i let emma take the lead. she was, in her own words, "livid". she just wanted to get drunk on new year's at the hotel bar. the hotel guys kept reiterating that "it's the 31st, madam", and she's all, "i know it's the 31st, that's why we are here, so let us in, we wanna drink." she was good. she explained to them that she wasn't afraid of tiny indians she can throw over one shoulder. it was great. they decided they'd LET us in (i don't think they'd've stopped us either way) in 10 minutes, once they found a table. they asked us to have a seat, but she needed to cooldown so out we go for a smoke. about 5 minutes, they came and got us, put us at a table with about 6 other drunk indians, then moved us to our own table. while emma was about to sit down, an indian at an adjacent table grabbed her ass, she popped him in the head, she can handle her own. we sat down and i noticed that a hotel guy with a big orange ribbon pinned to his chest, similar to a county fair ribbon, was standing near us for a while. we had our own personal security! hahaha, it was hilarious. our polish TA onsite found us and brought some champagne he'd had the hotel order special for us. it was good.

throughout the night we saw guys dancing lasciviously with other guys (nothing new), one guy dancing lasciviously all by himself with his handkerchief, an indian michael jackson, billy jean hat and all. at 11:54PM, all the indians started getting all rowdy and shaking hands... "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!" wtf?! we have 6 minutes left. there doesn't seem to be an official countdown in india as there is in the U.S. every indian in the bar and all the waitstaff came over to our table to be graced with all that is right and good through a handshake with the white people. then at the REAL midnight, me, emma, and the pollock had our own new year cheer, followed by more champagne, whisky, and beer. i'm tired and have been at work since 1AM, 2 jan 06. i'm done for now